By Halle Brindley – Opinions Section Editor 

I interviewed eight people on the topic of “situationships” on Valentine’s Day. It’s so uncomfortable to talk about, people were literally squirming while answering. Even their answers were uncertain. I will not disclose the interviewees’ names, but I will refer to them as Female Anonymous (FA) or Male Anonymous (MA) and myself as Halle (H). 

Defining a Situationship

H: What is a Situationship? 

FA2: (laughs… silence…) An unlabeled sort of romantic relationship. 

FA4: Mine was only about hooking up. 

H: Seeing each other romantically and doing other things together, is that not dating? 

FA4: Yeah, except no one puts a label on it. 

FA3: People are afraid of labels. There’s “exclusive,” I don’t believe in that, but there is “exclusivity.”  

FA4: “Exclusive” isn’t dating. Dating is “boyfriend” and “girlfriend.” 

FA3: Yeah, “dating” is dating, but “exclusive” is you’re not dating, but you’re not seeing anyone else. 

H: The difference is the title “boyfriend” or “girlfriend?” 

FA3: Yes, and generally you do more things. You get closer to the person. If you’re exclusive, I think it’s stupid.

FA4: I think it’s stupid too. If you’re exclusive just date. 

On Plans

H: What are your plans for Valentine’s Day? 

FA1: Uh.. To participate in the Bishop’s University Charity Fashion Show. 

MA1: To ask the girl I’m seeing to be my Valentine. 

H: Are you going on a date? 

FA1: Not that I know of. 

FA2: No, no, no, no, no. We are just friends. 

H: You’re in a situationship, right? 

FA1: (groans) Uh.. I mean if that’s what you call it. 

H: What’s the situation with your situationship? 

FA1: Oh god. I don’t know if I want to do this anymore [the interview]. The situation is that we are friends. 

 On Gestures

H: Do you get a gift for your situationship? 

FA3: Depends on the situationship. 

FA1: NO! 

MA4: Nope! No chance! 

H: Like, nothing? 

FA1: Nothing.  

H: Why? 

FA1: Cause, it’s strange. 

MA4: Cause, you know why bro. If you want something for Valentine’s Day, you know what you gotta do: be my girlfriend! 

MA1: If you’re a stand-up guy, you get the person you’re seeing something. 

H: Like what? 

MA1: You know those heart-shaped chocolate boxes? That and flowers. Something under 20 bucks. 

H: Do you think the way you act on Valentine’s Day can make or break a situationship? 

MA1: Well, no, it wouldn’t make it, but it would definitely break it. 

H: Do you think it has to be serious or on the path to dating to get your situationship something? Or to do something? 

MA1: No, it’s just a nice thing. 

MA2: (agrees) 

MA3: Yes, I think so. 

H: Can you take your situationship out for dinner? 

MA2: Nothing too fancy.  

H: So no, then? 

MA2: No. 

H: What did you do last Valentine’s Day with your situationship? 

MA3: Nothing probably. Don’t do what I did. Actually, we made tacos! 

H: You had been seeing this person for a while, why did you not want to do anything? 

MA3: I was nervous. 

H: In the end you invited them over to make and have dinner with you – 

MA3: Yes. 

H: Do you think if you are in a situationship that you should invite the person over for dinner? If even for something not necessarily romantic? 

MA3: Yeah, I mean it’s not like they will be having dinner with someone else. 

This is the most inconclusive piece I have ever written. My piece of advice is to do whatever your heart desires. Give your crush a cutie orange. Get it? Unless they have allergies to fresh fruit, then maybe just a doodle works or a Valentine.