Ilona Plat – Contributor

“It’s just so different going out now,” says my friend as we arrive at the pre-party. To put this into context, our friend group used to be quite big. However, with the majority of our friends having graduated last year, it is not the same when we go out anymore. The start of the new school year is a big wake-up call because this is the moment of the year when you hang out and party with your friends. But compared to previous years, it feels like something is missing: the rest of our buddies. This feeling is even worse, especially if your closest friend is one of those that already graduated. I believe many of us are, or will go through that problem during our time here at Bishop’s.

For most studying at university, we are expecting to graduate. However, it is not something that goes through your mind when making friends; that you might not graduate at the same time.. and that you may be left alone for your last year. This brings lots of changes, such as not necessarily having someone to go to your every course with, not having your ‘go to’ friend for group assignments, not being able to go to certain apartments to hang out, or even having to change roommates completely because they all graduated. This can create feelings of loss and loneliness, or even taint your motivation to be here.

Luckily for me, some of my graduate friends live nearby and come to visit often. They update me on how life is as a new workforce member. The thought is so interesting—having a steady salary, living in a big city, meeting new people and living in modern apartments surrounded by endless opportunities. I am not going to lie, these updates only furthered my loneliness, and have made me start to look forward to my own graduation. I too, want to have all those exciting things happen to me and get ‘started’ in life. It is easy to crave those things when you have been in the small town of Lennoxville for years. Also, since most of your friends have graduated, feeling a bit behind in life is unsurprising.

However, as I started to go down the road of counting the days until graduation, I realized that this was not the way to go about it. Sure, my friends are living fulfilling lives, and I miss them, but university is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Therefore, it is essential that you make the most of it. It is important to remind yourself that as humans, we are never satisfied with what we have, and only when we lose it do we realize how happy we were. As such, counting down the days to graduation isn’t the way to go; balance is better.

If you are in the same situation as me, I encourage you to alternate between seeing your friend(s) in the big city, whilst also enjoying some weekends together here. If you feel alone, try to join a club that interests you, or go to the bar. Of course, do not hesitate to reach out to your friends who are still here and create friendships with those around you. This will drastically improve your year, and will make you feel less alone. Deciding to put your life on hold to be with your graduate friends may result in your missing out on these precious university experiences, which you should be enjoying fully!