By Halle Brindley – Contributor

I know I say this every week, but this time, I mean it. I am not going to drink again for a while. 

It is the infamous hangover, isn’t it? The same hangover that you imposed on yourself because you had a little too much ethanol with cranberry juice the night before. It is just so good at the moment! What do you do? 

Benjamin Bridle, the current Gait manager, knows how to promote the Gait. He is a great businessperson who gets his target market. As a member of that target audience, I think it is safe to say that even if you know your alcohol limit, it gets thrown out of the window because the drinks don’t hit you until later. Drinking water will not take away that Euphoria moment you are going for; it will only stop alcohol from entering your bloodstream faster while preventing dehydration. Get the specialty drinks, but just don’t let the hangover win. 

If you can drink all those White Claws, you can have water too, Mr. Sugar Rush. No one but Vanellope von Schweetz — the little candy feind from Wreck-It Ralph — can handle these sugary drinks the next morning. It doesn’t seem like it at the moment, but you actually become dehydrated when you drink alcohol. Typically, the more you drink, the more dehydrated you are, and the worse your hangover is. Luckily, water (from the tap) is free at the Gait, so head up to the bar and save yourself a little bit of morning hatred by getting water. 

There is nothing quite like the girl’s bathroom at the bar. Serotonin City is in there. Part of the glamour of the bathroom at the Gait is how everyone is so sweet, probably a result of sipping on a tangy ole tequila sunrise. Under normal circumstances, the bathroom is quiet, but add in a few Gait profit contributors and the bathroom is a near-perfect replica of Barbie Land. When you keep seeing that one girl who complimented your shirt 15 minutes before, there’s zero coincidence there. You are going to the bathroom significantly more than you normally would be because you are drinking a lot more liquids than you usually would, because, once again, fluids are running through you faster than usual. The plant app that is supposed to help you drink water would go crazy on a Thursday, Friday or Saturday night. 

PACE YOURSELF or just do not drink alcohol. Non-alcoholic beers do exist, which I find are consumed less for their taste and more for participating in the social aspects of drinking. It is the adult version of giving a kid a root beer and them saying “I can’t see straight” as they tip over. A Broadway-worthy performance to say the least! A future Turner Studio alumni! I will let you in on a secret. If you pick out a non-alcoholic drink that you enjoy and can socially sip on, your taste buds will be grateful, and your head the next morning will have a better time. I am a big Shirley T kind of girl, but kombucha and sparkling water are good picks too. You are not confined to either healthy or alcoholic drinks – you can also have a sweet treat beverage. It is like a reward. And, you will stay hydrated with a fun little drink fidget to help with sober nerves. Turn that wine into water throughout the night so that hangovers are not your biggest opponents.