By Lilith Louise

I must be alone

I need breath in the cold

I need slow nights at home

Just me and the snow

I need hot tea and crackers

And chocolate and books

I need to spill words

Where nobody looks

To sleep like the bird

High above in a tree 

With the noise and the chaos

Far below my feet

I will nap in the day

And wake up in the night

I will build me a temple

With candles to light

I will pray for my heart

With its splintering edges

I will make it an altar

And give it to heaven

There are hurts I can’t heal

With my own stubborn will

There are blackouts of faith

Where fear comes to steal

Encroaching on blissfulness

Bold and too proud,

It leaves tracks in the snow

Of my holiest ground

So I’ll wait one more night

‘Till the snow falls again

And the fear melts away

Through the tip of my pen

My nose will be cold

And my cheeks will be flushed

But in ice, light will dance

And the voices will hush

Remembering me

For the thousandth time

Coming to rest

In knowing what’s mine

I’m the sunlight bursting

Through a heavy soul

The same youthful smile

As a body grows old

The very thing 

That I cannot express –

One with all things

Only needing to rest