Dear Whitney,
I was having sex the other night with my boyfriend, and he said “I love you.” I was completely caught off-guard, and I guess the time I took to silently freak out in my head was a little too long for his liking and he resumed his dirty talk. But… at the SAME time I responded with “I love you too.” So now I have no idea if he heard me. It’s now been about a week and nothing’s been said or happened. He hasn’t brought it up, and I’m way too scared to. I’m worried about a few things. Did he mean to say it? Did he hear me? And if he did, is he freaking out because I said it back? If he didn’t hear me, is he worried I didn’t say it? And worst of all, because it was during sex, did he even mean it? Am I overreacting?
—Lust Or Love?
Dear LOL,
I have no idea if this dirty talker meant it or not, or whether he heard your delayed response or not. But in all honesty, this comes down to your comfort level. If you feel too uncomfortable discussing something like this, then forget it happened; otherwise, simply bring it up to him—he is, after all, your boyfriend. It’s really not that complex. If you want to know what’s going through your man’s head, just ask him. But waiting too long may perpetuate the embarrassment, confusion, insult or disappointment he may feel—that is, if what he said was heartfelt and he didn’t hear your response. However, you must also accept the fact that he might not have meant what he said—God knows, we can all get a little carried away—so broaching the subject may be a little uncomfortable or excruciatingly awkward. But if your “I love you too” was really true, then let him know how you feel.
Love, Whitney
