Dear Whitney — November 9, 2009 4:56 pm

Dear Whitney: Heart Broken

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Dear Whitney,

It’s been about eight months since I was dumped, and every day I still think about the girl who broke my heart. I don’t speak to her and don’t want to. How do you get over a breakup?

–Heart Broken

Dear HB,

I know it sounds corny, but time heals all wounds—time and, of course, fucking other people. Did you know that every ounce of another woman’s saliva that you swallow, HB, shaves a week off the healing process? It’s a true and totally scientific fact. Okay, okay…it may not be proven, but I’m sure tons of others who’ve had their hearts trampled on would agree.

Love,
Whitney

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